My breasts are about to explode.
I have not fed little boobie monster today,
I had left the baby to her nanny and father and spent the day as an adult, an artist, a mother to the four year old child and a toursit in my most favurite city, Hvar, on hvar island.
Today i had no need to shout.
I have figured out why. Being with adrenalin loving toddler , is so stressfull, its constantley living in phisical strain and expectation and stress aobut the continuous dangers. The older child is trained to be less dangerous and one can relax a little, and even have a dinner in a restourant with them. So having exited the baby who on my arriving home i find happiley asleep with father(also asleep ) at 8pm. I had the most amazing day.
Having understood the four year old too, to be a little child- not simpley an enormousley big and must be faster, independent, giant in comparison to his sitter, i gave him more patience and understanding than usual, for which i feel better as well. As once one is holding a baby learning to walk- you can not simultaniousley give a hand to the four year old climbing some tree.
So today we played in the playground on Hvar, and ate at the amazing Passarola restourant twice and talked business, and took our first swim of the year quite properley and even supped - sub boarded a while on the emerald waters of Hvars shore.
That island for me is like pure magic. The second I place my foot on to its stone streets is like i enter a fammiliar stage setting, and a theatre play i know so well. The sun there is always shining, the sea is always emerald and wonderousley transparent. Mediteranian plants are in bloom, air smells of lavander. I some how encounter all the friends i want to encounter by pure chance and no prior telephone arrangement, just so in the streets, and often i incounter international friends from all over the world literarley . Today my son wanted to go on the sup board- and as i lie on the beach a firend appears from by gone years, and gives me a sup board to use- without my asking for it .. Its this kind of very direct magic that occurs on that island.
Last night at midnight i had a desire for a pasta or rizotto with sea food and vine, it was too late to eat at the time but today bam, i am treated to three versiones of that story at the restourant i am entering a project with . I mean of all their many many dishes- they give me- what i imagine and fancy witohut my having said a word, and that was nice. ..
So I am on a new project with this restoruant. I will be painting a series of portraits in the large dimensions and my old monument project style for their interior. Which is amazing. as i have for years sort of avoided that project despite it being one of my favurites, i have not developed it to the end, to its furthest possibilites just becosue i had felt here that the portrait is not an apriciated thing in geografic setting. So this gives me a boost, to go play, again, in materials and style and subject i love, develop it a little further, and i am so gratefull for this boost. It takes me away form all the sail boats in watercolor, and oil landscapes of small fishing town which i have made my living form reecentley, and puts me back on to my own page, portraits of men and women, god damn monumntal beautifil portraits women, go, do!
Thank you universe.
This restourant having for a few years harboured one of the best, most talented chefs in croatia and internatonaley acclaimed Hrvoje Zirojević , is one of those celebrity trappinng spiderwebs for those fine expensive booties entering the island form mega yachts. Being there agian made me get in touch with the chef after a long time, i laways love jamming with talented progressive people, who make me feel like everything is possible and who boost our self confidence and open up the limits so that put a smile on my face
Some years back Hrvoje treated me and my dear firend Tatiana, mexican artist to dinner under the stars at Passarola, and just to surprise him back, i gave him an enoromus oil painting for that dinner that same evening to say thank you, just becosue he is super talented, and i feel talent should be apriciated. But he is internatonal and more traveled than i. The restoruants fight for him for be theirs for a year, as he sets alight every place he goes to like a super nova, his enerrgy with his kitchen team, marvelous inventiones for the palette and the eye, make him a magnet for internationals who swarm to where ever he cooks. An ode to a chef this is turning in to, of course i will have to paint him.
Exhausted. Must sleep. good night
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