The stalker who lives in my phone

Im simpley going to have to tell you aobut this charachter.

He phoned me today 8 times, its earley yet mind 2pm, that number will be double by the end of the day. Yeasterday he phoned 19 times. Day before he phoned me 17 times. The phone is on vibrate, i can't listen to the electronic drill so often. Even the vibrating is too much, I bury it in pilows and put it on to the carpet so it does not vibrate trough the couch into me. When I hear it I want to put the phone in to the closest glass of water, or smash it in to the toilet.

Would you say that I have a stalker?

That I should not pick up the phone to this number?.

And so I dont pick up the phone, and than the same man, rings from one of his other multiple numbers . Just to make sure I am not awoiding him, or if I am, he breaks the silence barrier all the same satisfiying him self beating me with this little bit of trickery.

And than he asks politley as if surprried " I belive I have called you two times today, why did you not pick up?".

Than when I make my as polite as can be and varied enough to change from the previous day exscuse, he alters his question pointiendley" I must have called you 12 times and I have left a meassage on the telephone, did you not see?" . And than i just as politley avert the truth by giving a placidifying reason, which does not prevent me sensing a certain colour red rage steaming out of his ears on the other end of the satelite connection.

When I do pick up the phone the conversation may take three directions.

CONVERSATION 1 " He will ask what time is my husband going to drive somwhere." . This question usualy preeceds a trip Mladen is taking a week later. The same question will have been put forwardd to M's father, his mother, M himself several times, the trip would have been anounced to his borther, counsin, uncle and aunt. Before phoning me up for the second, third, fourth, fifth time to aks me what time is he traveling, what time is he going to arrive at his destination and that i ought to tell him to drive slowley becosue , roads are dangerous becosue other driwers , in particular to warn him aobut the lunatics who drive kamikazi style wrong way down a three lane motorway."

CONVERSATION 2 " He will ask when am I going to go to the doctors" . This question usualy preeceds my going to the doctors for a check up by two weeks and folows my having been to the doctors that same day. It is true that I have a baby on the way. The doctors check up results are usualy the only time I actualy have news to share, but if I should so much as dial his number, to satisfy the pesky dear and let him know the good news, before I have even left the hospital he allready had heard all I was aobut to say, using grape vine technologies. Never the less he will phone me two more times that day to ask me to repeat what I had to say. He will than phone another bunch of irrelevant of times just becouse, how many i can not say, as you see by then I have burried the phone in some anti vibrating clothes.

CONVERSATION 3 " What will be the babies name". It is a matter aproached less loosley, having driained me of resssitance and phoned every day for a week, at which point i would have lost my defensivnes, this subject will be hatched at the tail end of one of the other conversations.

Not to be un fair. This question will have been preceded by a gift pack , constituted of carefully wrapped viel shnitzels he has himself bashed thin and wrapped in aluminium, ready for me to fry, and a piece of meat for a soup together with all the vegetables a soup needs, complete with a vegetable stock cube for the full recepie.Also boxes of chocholates, lemons, oranges, fresh island flowers, will have been sent from the south of the country to me, transported by hubby on one of his trips.

After an itroductory conversation aobut the husbands driving back and forth on the gift box delivery, than a refferance checking if i have recived all the particulars in the box, he asks what will be the name of the baby. At the answer he allready knows, he spits and makes some insulting comments, before, telling me he loves me, and asking that the baby should carry his name.



Tomorow my husband is traveling. My next medical exam is next week, and I have not picked up the phone for 3 days. It has become a battle of stamina as to who will win. The longer i do not pick up the phone, the less I want to. And it is driving him mad. He is phoning up with the vengence of a hive of wasps in attack after their nest has been kicked down. He has allready recieived all the information he wants to know from M who he has phoned up muliple times each day, and yet he continues to purusue me.

When he upsets anyone other he gets away with mention of and his old age. But i have no right to refuse him. So he belives. I am new and little in the hirearchy which binds us. I can not enteriely refuse to speak to this man and he knows it, and uses it. His glory days where those of communism. When seecret service knew just aobut everything, using these same methods of speaking to every person, and scrutinising every point of view, to find out each little detial of any situation, by asking the same questions stupifinigley agian and agian until there are no seecrets kept from him. In those days a girl like me down in the hirearchy , would not have dared to refuse a telephone call, from him.

So, he persists as if it is his right, he dials my number again and aigan until he wears out the battery.

Who is this man?. And why have i not shaken him off, god knows I have the gift of gab that can.

Curtesy ,binds me.

The man who calls me on avarage 20 times a day, every day of the week, at any hour, is unfortunaltey no proper proffesional stalker per say, who i could report to the police and have sent away. I cant even use mladens lawyer knowledge to compose some sort of well written threat, or have him macho style bang his fists on his cheast, yell and make him go away, for my inexhaustable caller is non other than the short, slightley rounded, and red faced man,that is my husbands well meaning, and dearley beloved old grandad.